2019 - Release the Queen In You with Natalie Louis

Did You Ask?

Over the last couple of months, thoughts about my future have been on my mind daily. I've been thinking about where I am and where I would like to be. Though I've accomplished a lot I still have so much more work to do. Thinking about your future can be scary, overwhelming and if you're not careful you could start comparing yourself to others. Comparing yourself to others is not wise but in the days of social media, you get to see a lot of highlights of other people's lives and sometimes you start to compare your life to them. Sometimes we want things that aren't in God's will for our lives but because we haven't even asked him about his will we feel we are missing out. "best life" without even asking God what are his plans for our lives.

You've tried everything and you are still feeling like you just can't get ahead and maybe that's not where God wants you to be right at this moment and that is okay. When my mother started to get sick in May I had to make a choice to keep trying to do my will or surrender it over to the Lord. Though it didn't feel good I knew I had to take a much-needed break and focus on my family. What I wasn't expecting is the transformation this journey has done to me. I have never felt some of the ways I've felt because this was new. I'm used to being the woman that has everything under control but caregiving for my mother left me all out of control. Day to day I had no idea what I would be dealing with and I had no other choice but to just go with it.

God has a way of getting our attention when we are not giving him all of ours. I was so focused on my "brand" I wasn't paying attention to what was happening now I just wanted to get to my "next". I've had to sit back and allow God to have his way! The battle was within me! I wanted to do what I thought I wanted to do and God had to show me that what he has in store is so much greater! He's given me endless ideas on how to walk in the purpose and plan that he has for me and not the one I started to chase on my own. God's blessings add no sorrow and though I was getting the speaking engagements, radio interviews and my brand was very visible it was not where God wanted me to be. What are you doing that you shouldn't be? Just because you're good at it doesn't mean that's what God has for you to do or maybe it's not the right time for you to do those things.

I now have so much more direction and clarity because I surrendered to God's will for me. I am 100% certain that I am supposed to help women who feel unworthy and unloved to accept God's love and call upon their lives. It's funny because when I look back I realized that's what I've been doing all along anyway! I don't know what plans you've created or what you're thinking about doing in the future but I want to challenge you to pause and pray. Before you make the next decision I want you to take some time and ask God if that is what he really wants you to do. God's plan and purpose for your life will prevail with or without your permission so you might as well make sure you're in his will before you waste your own time, money and efforts. You can be sincere but you can be sincerely wrong!

Don't do anything without asking God first! It doesn't matter what it is! If someone came into your life and wants to date you seek God on it. If someone comes to you with a business idea be sure to seek God on it. If you're thinking about going into business seek God and make sure that's what he wants you to do! Don't just jump into things without consulting with the master coach!

I pray this encourages you to stop asking Facebook and start seeking God's word. Only God can reveal to you the secrets of his plan for you!

Call to Me and I will answer you, and tell you [and even show you] great and mighty things, [things which have been confined and hidden], which you do not know and understand and cannot distinguish.’ Jeremiah 3:33

Confidence - 10/14/2019

Make Time For Yourself!

It's so easy to get caught up with the cares of life and take care of everyone and everything but yourself. This is something that women have been doing for years and it's not healthy or anything to be worn as a badge of honor. Neglecting yourself to be there for others isn't wise. We wear so many different hats and barely do we take a moment to just be. If we make time to do so we find ourselves still giving our time to those who don't even think about waiting before they come to us with their request. Saying no isn't always fun but it's necessary. You can't pour from an empty cup and it's time for us to take time for ourselves so we can be filled. I want to share with you three reasons why your me-time should not be negotiable.

If you aren't well nothing else will be.

After coming back in town after a speaking engagement in January I hit the ground running. I was so empowered to accomplish my goals I did not take any breaks, I barely got some rest and I was busy, not productive. Sooner or later all of that caught up with me and I caught this awful virus that lasted for two weeks. I felt horrible! While I was trying to go hard I went too hard and ended up sick! When you aren't well not only are you forced to have several seats nothing else in your life can go well either. You can't run a business while you're sick! I kept trying to do my live videos and be social but my body wouldn't allow me to do anything but rest. You must take care of yourself! Be open to saying yes a lot less and set boundaries so you can take time to make sure you're healthy.

2. Say no.

I used to feel like I had to say yes to everyone and everything and thank God I got over that quickly! Saying no is not a bad thing. If you continue to overextend yourself you're going to end up feeling unlike yourself. You can not want to please people so bad that you ignore your mental, physical and spiritual health! You don't have to be everywhere and do everything! Every invitation does not mean you have to RSVP. Say no!

3. Make time for me-time.

One of the biggest reasons why so many of us are frustrated, overwhelmed and overworked is due to us not making time for ourselves. How can you empower others when you aren't empowered? How can you help others when you haven't had a moment for yourself? You've got to learn to make time for me-time. Start with 30 minutes a day. I like to do this in the morning because it sets the tone for my day. You can do whatever it is you like during this time. I like to read and write so I make time for that. Maybe you like to work out or get some more sleep whatever you like to do just as you schedule your day make sure you add me-time to that to-do list!

Don't apologize or allow yourself to feel guilty for taking some me time. You must take time to be well, learn to say no and schedule me-time in your daily schedule so you can feel better mentally, physically and spiritually. Don't continue to neglect yourself. Start taking these steps today and don't forget to have your me-time.

Confidence - 09/02/2019

Don't Call Me Your Strong Friend!

After months of transition, I’ve concluded that I no longer want to be “the strong friend” The strong friend is the friend that continues to uplift, encourages, always prays and listens to her friends even when she is going through pure hell herself. I’ve learned that the strong friend supports everyone but unfortunately, she doesn’t get that same love and support herself. A strong friend could be on the edge of losing her mind and absolutely no one will stop and take a moment to ask is she okay? The strong friend is the one who is exhausted with telling her friends what’s wrong and gets nothing but “be strong” “You got this” “You can handle it” honestly sometimes we can’t! I’ve had some life changing things going on the last couple of months and if I were to get paid for how many times, I’ve heard those three statements I think I’d be rich! I realize that most people just don’t know what to say so they say anything, but I’ve learned silence and golden and venting doesn’t mean you're weak it means you need to release. The strong friend doesn’t get to vent because people always tend to say one of those three statements I’ve mentioned above and that pretty much means shut up, it’s my turn and please help me with my issues. Meanwhile, the strong friend just must continue to be “strong”

Over the last few months I’ve felt every single emotion there is to feel and though I put one foot in front of the other I had days that I didn’t know if I was coming or going. I was numb. I spent most of my time trying to figure things out and that lead to frustration, overwhelm and anxiety. I learned to let go and really let God. I’ve learned that though I’m strong I have my moments of uncertainty, moments where my faith is weary and moments where I just want to throw in the towel. I’ve learned some valuable lessons that I believe will help me continue this journey of unlearning what I thought I already knew. In order to stop being the “strong friend,” you must first realize that you can’t help everyone, and everyone isn’t your assignment. Sometimes the best help you can be to people is to be absolutely nothing at all. In the moments where I felt I needed help, I depended on God to make a way and he did every single time. You can not pour from an empty cup and you shouldn’t try when it’s half full either. I’m dedicated to living a life of overflow so that giving no longer leaves me dry. Sometimes we run ourselves dry trying to be everyone, be everywhere and do everything. In this time of me being still, I really got a chance to realize how much I give of myself to others yet don’t always get that in return. It’s in my nature to give but sometimes I give too much.

Being a strong friend doesn’t mean I don’t go through things or need support from time to time. Being a strong friend doesn’t mean I don’t have moments where I cry. Being a strong friend doesn’t mean I always have it together because truth be told most of us don’t. Your strong friends go through pure hell alone and though the quote “Check on your strong friends” is trendy how many people do it? A text, a phone call, a visit, a lunch date it’s really the simple things that can make someone’s day brighter. I’ve disassociated myself from being prideful about being strong because the test that I’ve had to face and overcome these last couple of months attempted to kill me but one thing I know for sure is when I am weak God is strong! So, to all my “strong friends” I want to let you know it’s okay to resign. Take off your strong mask and stop trying to save the world. You must save yourself first and it is not selfish for you to do so. Take all the time you need to be still and allow God to polish your crown. What is for you will not pass you by.

Love,

Natalie

Confidence - 06/30/2019

How Boundaries Will Bless Your Life!

Boundaries Will Bless Your Life!

I’ve been MIA and to be honest it felt great! I’ve learned so much over the last couple of months! Life has a way of interrupting your plans and making you take a moment to just breathe. You can be fully functioning yet ignoring your mental, physical and spiritual growth and that is a dangerous place to be. I was in that place and didn’t even know it. I was busy and booked yet burned out. I was laughing but ignoring the things that made me cry trying to be strong. Being strong almost killed me. When you’re strong you’re allowing your pride and ego to rule you. I no longer subscribe to that “strong women” pride that many flaunt as a badge of honor. I’m tired of going through things just to go through! I’m tired of being strong while carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders. I don’t even know why the heck we think that’s a good thing! A woman’s strength should not be based on how much she can handle! We think if we carry all that crap and continue to function that we’re good. We’ve got to stop acting like we aren’t human and realize it’s okay to feel emotions.

We were created to have healthy emotions and to manage them. The problem comes when we allow ourselves to become numb to our reality and then we start living in fantasy land. This is how many women end up in cycles going through the same crap with the same man, friends and boring job. I refuse to be that woman! I have been her and I will never allow myself to lose myself in the thoughts and opinions of others. I will not allow myself to lose myself trying to be everything to everyone. I will not allow myself to be bound by people, places and things that no longer serve me. I’ve learned that boundaries will bless your life! Setting boundaries will keep you from being all over the place. I want to share three ways you can get your life and stay blessed!

Say No and mean it!

Stop allowing people to make you feel some type of way because you said no. You don’t have to feel guilty about it or allow anyone to make you feel bad because you said no. It’s okay to say no to that event, meeting or anything else that you really don't want to do. Someone who will force you to do something you really don’t want to do does not love you. Say no and mean it!

Peace is priceless!

Anything and I mean anything that cost your peace is way too expensive and you can not afford it! If anything is making you stress, feel horrible and not bringing peace, love or joy into your spirit it’s okay to set proper boundaries and protect your peace at all cost! Say no, delete, unfollow and block in real life!

Explain for what?

People don’t always need a long drawn out explanation! This is your life you don’t have to explain why you chose to live life the way you are. If you are doing what God told you to do no further explanation is needed. People will place their expectations on you that they don’t even follow themselves! Do not become a slave to people’s thoughts and opinions of you! People who are master manipulators will make you feel like you must explain your every move. Don’t fall for the foolery!

Taking this break has been such a blessing to my life. I’m thankful that God slowed me down so I can fully breakdown the areas of my life where I need to grow and become better. I’m far from perfect and I mess up daily but what I know for sure is God didn’t place me on this earth to be frustrated, busted and disgusted! I’ve learned so much and the number one thing I’ve learned is how boundaries will bless your life! I’m much more clear, focused and joyful because I refuse to be a prisoner to myself or anyone else! Set some boundaries and continue to live a blessed life!

Confidence - 05/24/2019

Just Say No!

Repeat after me. No! No! No! No is a word that is so hard for many people to say and so hard for many people to understand. When you allow yourself to become a "yes" person you have no boundaries and you will eventually be burned out. There is so much power in taking complete control over your life and the best way to do that is to set proper boundaries so you can live in peace. Peace is priceless! You have to learn to protect your peace at all times! When I started saying no I realized just how bad I lacked boundaries. I was so frustrated trying to be everything to everyone while getting nothing in return. I had to make myself clear that I was no longer going to tolerate just anything. When I made the choice to say no, a lot changed. I lost people who I loved. I lost people who we're not for me. I was upset at first then I realized I needed to say no so I can see what I needed to see and move on accordingly!

Setting boundaries for your life will save your life! Unfortunately people will try to take advantage of you and unless you set some boundaries you wont notice it until it's too late. You will become worn out from lack of boundaries and when you need the favor in return and no one will be there. You can't pour from an empty cup and if you're the only one pouring who's pouring into you when you're empty? People will attempt to get you to do things that will benefit them but what about what you need and where you're trying to go? We are in a world where everyone is trying to get money but you have to know that all money isn't good money and every opportunity is not your opportunity! Being able to say no without any hesitation is such a beautiful thing! Don't feel bad about saying no to things that don't align with who you are. You have to be careful not to get out of position and get distracted by anything or anybody! While you're striving to accomplish your goals distractions will come but you have to set boundaries that will keep you focused on your end goal.

Since I've been working on my third book Broken No More I have had to say no to a lot of things that just didn't align with my goal and I didn't feel bad about it either. I didn't care who was asking if I felt I needed to say no I said no. I realized I was doing more than I wanted to do so I had to make some changes so I can stay focused on my goal. I'm thankful that I did because it opened my eyes to a few things. I learned I don't have to be everywhere doing everything. I realized I don't have to over extend myself chasing money and opportunities. I realized the importance of being still and trusting the process. I'm not sure what you need to say no to but I can say if it doesn't feel right it's probably not right for you. Take some time to set boundaries so you can remain focused and be less stressed. Never allow someone else's need to become your emergency. Say no and don't feel bad about it!

Confidence - 03/24/2019

Did You Ask?

Make Time For Yourself!

Don't Call Me Your Strong Friend!

How Boundaries Will Bless Your Life!

Just Say No!

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