"You may not be responsible for what happened to you but your healing is your responsibility"
Will Smith
This quote may not feel good but it the absolute truth. So many times we are living from a place of pain and not a place of purpose. Pain is what we are comfortable with because it allows us to stay in our comfort zone of what we are used to. When you walk in purpose it will be uncomfortable. Your true purpose will push you to unfamiliar places that will cause you to be stretched like never before. Whatever happened to you doesn't have to be who you become. You are not the situation that you've gone through! Though the situation was hard you survived it! You're not a victim you're victorious! Some people were not fortunate to make it through a lot of the things you've gone through. You are still here because even with the things of your past God still wants to use you. Only God can turn a mess into a message and as he does that he will restore, renew and redeem you. I am a living witness to that because he's been doing it in my own life. As a breakthrough coach, it's my desire to see women break free from the bondage of their past. For years I allowed my past to prevent me from being all that God has called me to be. I want to share three ways you can start your journey of healing.
1) Stop being ashamed.
I don't know what you've had to endure but I know that it can sometimes make you feel ashamed because it happened to you. For a long time, I kept what I endured a big secret. I blocked out the entire situation and swept it under a rug. I was smiling and pretending I was okay but I was not. I felt at fault, I felt stupid and I kept asking myself what could I have done differently. I decided to unravel all the pinned up feelings I had and release it. What happened to you is not your fault so don't allow the situation to hold you, hostage, any longer.
2) Seek help.
Yes, you can pray and you should be praying but it's also absolutely nothing wrong with seeking wise counsel, in fact, the Bible says to do just that. If you need to go to therapy or counseling make an appointment and go. Keeping your feeling inside will not only stop you from moving forward but create a root of bitterness to spring up and that will lead to anger towards the wrong people. Anything swept under the rug will eventually come to the surface and it will not pretty. Healing is a beautiful journey and it's okay that you're still struggling with things because we all are. Seek the needed help so you can live life free.
3) Block out the noise.
"Voices bring choices" Bishop Rodney R. Roberts. When you have multiple people telling you how you should handle something and what you should be doing confusion will set in. You will be so confused and overwhelmed when trying to make the best choice for you. As you are seeking help don't allow yourself to be caught up in what other people think for you. The wise counsel will guide you from the word of the Lord others will guide you from their emotions. Emotions are temporary and fleshly. The bible says the heart is desperately wicked. Don't follow something that could lead you down a wrong path. Block out the noise. Block out the negative thoughts that are going to try to tell you that you aren't enough. Block out the people who think you should be who they want you to be. Block out the excuses you'll find to stop you from starting. You have to want your healing so bad that nothing get's in the way of it.
When I stopped being ashamed, I started to seek help and I blocked out the noise I was able to hear God clearly and work on myself. I was able to listen for his instruction and do what he said to do. It wasn't until I got out of my own way that God showed me who I am in him. I was so busy trying to figure things out on my own I was keeping myself stuck. Allow yourself grace on this journey of healing. Take things one day at a time but always move forward because your healing is your responsibility.